Mark Hughes
VerifiedPG Dip, MBACP
Counselor/Therapist
London, UK
Answers questions in Addictions · Anxiety · Bullying
What I do
I work with individuals both online via Skype and email. I used to work in person but now live on a boat and move around, so can only work remotely now.
I'm a qualified and experienced counsellor (seeing clients since 2005), and member of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP).
Qualifications
Postgraduate Diploma in Psychosynthesis Counselling (UEL)
BSc Hons Phys (Manc)
My story
I offer online video or email counselling.
I work with all issues, am trained in the techniques of psychosynthesis, and with experience of gender psychology, intimate relationships, and men's issues.
As well as being a qualified counsellor, I have had an eventful life and my work is influenced by my own experience, and the need to find my own unique way through challenges and dificulties.
Why life is worth living
it is what we were born to do.
Treatment Offered
Specialties
Therapy approaches
Patient population
Modalities
Answered Questions(19)
Will my depression go away now I'm free of the situation that caused it?
I have depression but I don’t feel better even though I am no longer in a difficult situation that caused my depression. I was in a work situation where I was systematically belittled, undermined, gossiped about and bullied for 18 months by a group of workers who were related and that were resentful that I got a higher job than they had. They got everyone in the company to sabotage and torpedo everything I tried to do so I would look incompetent. The harassment got so bad that I went to my employer but he wasn’t interested in helping and he told me that if I couldn’t do the management part of the job I would get demoted. I started feeling sick a lot from IBS and I had to take time off quite often which meant I couldn’t meet my objectives and my contract was not renewed. It was a horrible experience but it ended 2 months ago and I still don’t feel any better. I thought my depression would go away on its own after I was no longer faced with daily harassment. Will it?
Read answer →Should I tackle my son over drinking so much diet soda?
Diet soda and mental illness – any link I should really worry about as the father of a depressed adolescent young man who drinks more than a quart of diet soda a day. He’s been through enough so I want to pick my battles appropriately. I don’t want to nag at every little thing.
Read answer →Can you recommend software to help me reduce my internet use?
Can you recommend a simple software to use to help me control my online behaviors. I can’t stay off the internet entirely but once I get on I can lose hours and hours to useless surfing. I feel like I go into a trance state and I can honestly lose a half day in what feels like the blink of an eye. What I need is something that will keep me on task and boot me off once I am done what I started out to do.
Read answer →Will technology create safer ways of getting high?
Do you think that in the future we will be able to stimulate dopamine and serotonin electronically in the brain and then once we do people will be able to get insanely high and experience total ecstasy just by pressing a button? Because you wouldn’t have to inject or smoke any toxins to do this wouldn’t this be much better for people than taking dirty street drugs like today? Is there any body researching the development of this kind of system? From a harm reduction perspective, do you think this would be a good thing – after all, people will never stop wanting to get mind-altered, will they?
Read answer →I'm stuck and want to know how to snap out of it?
I feel really hopeless right now. All I do is go to work 6 days a week and I hate my job but at least it gives me something to do because on Sundays, and this is really sad, there is nothing that I even want to do. I have no money for expensive outings or vacations and everything I could do, I have done a thousand times and can’t really get excited about doing again. I have honestly tried doing new things, like I actually went and got my old roller blades out of my parents garage to try that again because I used to like doing it, but now it just feels so stupid and I also feel kind of ridiculous. I can’t remember the last time I was excited about doing something rather than just going through the motions. I just don’t know how to snap out of this.
Read answer →Can I be sure of confidentiality over webcam therapy?
My wife and I are having intimacy issues. There are physical components. I believe that we should speak to a sex therapist but in truth we are both quite bashful to do so. I believe that if we could do this at home it would be much easier and less embarrassing. If there needs to be physical demonstrations in a session I think I could do that much easier over a webcam than in an office. But I am worried that things we transmit are not secure and I work in a sensitive position…it would be very embarrassing, politically disastrous, if any video was ever leaked. Does this ever happen? How safe is this for me?
Read answer →What should I write about in my journal?
This is a stupid question. I am trying to quit marijuana and alcohol and I am also having a hard time with a bad break up with a person I had thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with. A professional I spoke to about it recommended that I keep a journal. It sounded good and I even went out and bought a fancy leather looking notebook thingy to write in. Problem is, when I sat down to write I didn’t have a clue what I was supposed to talk about…like what I had for dinner that night or a list of what I had done that day. Honestly I couldn’t think of anything better to write about. Doesn’t seem very helpful. What kinds of things am I supposed to be writing down to make this work?
Read answer →Can I manage my marijuana use or do I have to choose?
I’m a musician and DJ. Music is very important to me, it is me. I have a marijuana problem. It interferes with my relationships and memory and makes me a less good dad than I want to be. These are good reasons to want to quit, and I do, but on the other side music is part of my core identity and without weed I just can’t sink into music like I need to to do what I do. So what I have to do is smoke it at work and then leave it at work. Problem is I am not able to do that. And since I work in a home studio a lot, the lines between work and family get real hazy. Wish I didn’t need to choose between passion/work and family. Is there any way I can get better at controlling my smoking so I don’t have to stop altogether? I gotta admit that just trying to smoke less isn’t working real great.
Read answer →Is mephedrone addictive?
How bad is mephedrone? Is it as addictive as cocaine? My friends are using it but I am scared to try it. Should they be scared of getting addictied?
Read answer →What Can I do - I'm Too Scared To See A Counsellor
I am scared to get therapy. I think I need it but I can never make myself make an appointment or walk into an office to book a session. Not sure how you can help me with this but do you have any advice?
Read answer →How Can I Learn Not To React So Angrily?
Hello, I have had some problems with impulse control since growing up as in when I didn't get my way at home, I slammed doors, I am 39 now and in rage have run away from home 3 times in the last yr only to return feeling confused about my own behaviour; now before you say I should be living on my own at almost 40, I have, a couple of times, but after a breakup of an engagment (I impusively would lose it on him but I knew he wasn't the one and probably impulsively got into the relationship, though I did want marriage, I impulsivly picked him based on a comment of someone saying ok it's time, just do it); I want to be a 100% responsbile for my reactions/and respond to situations, not react, as it has cost me jobs, relationships, and almost turning 40 now, I had a breakdown when I ran from home on one occasion where my mother's comment that I wasn't listening to her when I was just trying to cook something to feel better after being laid off from my job and also after breakup of a relationship, had left me low; I felt so insulted by her comment that I am almost 40 and don't listen, that I insulted her, ran to my room and was throwing a chair at my bed and screaming and swearing; thankfully no one but the workers working on renos I don't know heard, however, since then my confidence/self-esteem has recovered somewhat but a deep sadness is still there, as I don't know how I can trust myself in any situation, if I have to be worried about my own reactions; something that has also been reflected to me in relatinships with men, who have said they don't know even after they find me amazing and loving and a great catch, they don't know if they can talk to me without me intterupting, breaking up with them over and over (out of fear of being hurt is probably y I do it,but i realize this is not fair and hurts them, even if justified, it can be done in a rational thought out manner); Please help I want to get a handle on this. I am generally very loving, caring and emotional, into art and admired by people; but when life failures or big events that are negative happen and I feel repeated disappointed wt a job or relationship is when I lose it, or when I am afraid in a relationship with a man mainly. Other than that, I am completely calm, meditate daily and am more than fine, now with mediations, things like my impulsive speeding when driving and my impulsive dating one man after another (without getting too close physically, though emotionally still draining as I have tried hard to be engaged/married again but feel stuck), dating and driving much better with meditation; since I was a teenager they put me on mild antidepressants/anti anxiety but no offense they did nothing to help me permanently; the mediation is what helps in a real way, but still the temper loss I had with throwing a chair at my bed and hitting my bed scared me. Please let me know what are healthy ways to express anger/redirect the energy so when major negative events happen, easier to deal with. for example I had such a positive attitude after being laid off as I hated my job and although I was shocked for 10 minutes, I was singing on the way home, feeling free, but I didn't tell anyone I told evone I quit. then the breakup happened with someone I thought I might marry and my mother's reaction which was not that bad but treating me like a 2 year old made me lose it bad. I want to trust myself again, I want to know that I will never have impulsive issues; as even impulsive comments online, once got me into big trouble a few years back, and now on facebook, affected my relationship with my sister in a very unnecessary -ve way, just because i didn't feel good that day and was stressed and posted something stupidly.
Read answer →How Can I Tell If My Fiancee Really Loves Me?
My fiancée says she loves me and I love her completely but there are a lot of times when I do not believe her. She simply doesn’t act like it. I have no real money or anything like that so there is no reason for her to be marrying me other than because she wants to. Is there some way I can find out if she really loves me for real? What is the number one sign that proves a person loves another?
Read answer →Can Two Sex Addicts Heal Each Other?
Is it ever possible for 2 sex addicts to get together to heal each other? This sounds stupid but I met this girl at a Sex Addicts 12 steps meeting last week and I can’t get her out of my mind because it is like she is the first person I have ever met who understands me. People at the meeting are freaking like it’s the worst idea ever. We are doing it, of course. But I feel like we can help each other. She is 2 months into recovery and I am 3 weeks.
Read answer →How long do I have to meditate?
How long do you have to meditate for every day to get a lasting stress beating effect? I am very stressed out and I am willing to try meditation since everyone tells me how well it works. I do not really relish the thought of sitting and doing nothing so I would like to do it for as little time each day as possible. I am having trouble getting reliable information on how much is enough?
Read answer →At what age is it ok for children to drink energy drinks?
At what age is it ok for children to drink energy drinks. My next door neighbor lets her kids drink redbulls all day. They are about 8 and 10 or so. Two boys. They are totally crazy all day and then every night they have these melt downs as their dad yells at them to go to sleep for like an hour. I sit out on my porch and I watch them have many cans. The parents just seem to want to watch TV and just let the kids do whatever they want to. To me this is just insane. I mentioned it sort of joking like to my neighbor and he got really offended and told me to mind my own business. I want to know if this qualifies as abuse? Kids shouldn’t be so hyper caffeinated all the time should they?
Read answer →Would a lightbox help me working nightshifts?
I started working the overnight shift about 3 months ago and after about a month I started to feel a lot more fatigued and sad than I normally am. It obviously has something to do with my change in routine, since nothing else in my life has really changed and nothing bad has happened. I sleep Ok in the daytime but I never wake up feeling refreshed. Do you think one of those really strong lights people use for winter depression might help me, since I never really see much daylight? I think it might fix my problem but I do not want to buy one since they are expensive unless it is likely to work.
Read answer →Is sensory isolation good for depression
I am a depressive with social anxiety who prefers to go unmedicated for personal reasons. I am searching for alternative methods to help get my depression especially a little more under control and I have been looking at floatation therapy. Supposedly some studies have been done that say that spending time in a sensory isolation flotation chamber is good for depression. Do you agree that this is the case?
Read answer →How can I quit marijuana when my husband is still smoking it?
My husband and I are both long time marijuana smokers (him 18 years, me 12 years). I am tired of the habit and want to quit. He still loves it and never wants to stop smoking. It would be hypocritical of me to tell him to quit. Unfortunately, with him still smoking multiple times per day it is very hard for me to get past my own cravings and I keep relapsing despite my good intentions. How can I quit when it’s all around me all the time, in my own home? I still love him dearly, by the way, so leaving him for this is not an option on the table.
Read answer →Does a little daily marijuana affect my memory?
I like to eat marijuana in small quantities. I find that when I make some cannabutter and then eat just a small dose a couple of times a day I feel more relaxed and less anxious and it does not seem to affect my performance at work since I am not really high, just a little mellow (I work as a dental hygienist so it would not be OK if I was obviously high or smelled like pot…lol!). I am talking about pretty small amounts, not so anyone would ever know that I am high, that I eat everyday almost like a medicine (but I have no medical reason to buy). The one thing that I am concerned about is if eating a little marijuana every day is going to affect my memory in bad ways?
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